Decision paralysis is real
Food for thought for the week ahead
Happy Monday, TMM readers.
Here’s your weekly reminder that nothing you see online is ever what it seems—I know this is said all the time, but the warped world we live in sometimes leads us to believe otherwise. It’s important to remember this that we’re all just doing our best.
And don’t listen to Sima Aunty, everyone deserves more than 60%.
A Serious Case of Decision Paralysis
I don’t know about you but the older I get, the harder it is becoming to make decisions. Even the simple ones. As a child, teenager, or even in college—everything mostly felt low risk and acting on impulse was how most of us functioned. You wanted to do something? Do it. You wanted to go after something? Go for it. Obviously given the ages we were back then, most of these decisions were not major or life-impacting but the freedom to make them without all the adult baggage we carry now sounds so enticing.
If you’ve been a TMM reader, you may have some context, but if you’re new here—in Jan 2022 I went through some very out of the blue digestive issues (chronic constipation which led to the development of fissures). This is TMI but it’s become such a big part of my daily life over the past 8 months and it sometimes is all I can I can think or talk about. It’s taken so much from me and to say it’s been a rollercoaster is an understatement. (Also, we as a society do not talk enough about how so many of us are impacted by chronic digestive issues because it’s not “sexy” to talk about poop but I’ll save that for another day and more on that in this episode of the pod).
More than the intense physical pain, it’s impacted my mental health and motivation which continues to worsen as my situation continues to be in flux. I’m now at a big crossroads in my health journey and have to make a decision—to move forward with a very painful surgical procedure or to manage my symptoms/pain the way I’ve been, which impacts my quality of life and daily routine in a big way. Hello, decision paralysis.
My battle is rooted in a horrible case overthinking and overanalyzing—once again, classic Type A personality behavior. Envisioning all the outcomes, positive and negative and then going down multiple roads and made-up scenarios. If I knew any one option was a 100% win, it would be a no brainer but because both have their own benefits and risks, and as Nelly feat. Kelly said it, I’m at a Dilemma.
While my situation is health-related, I also constantly find myself second-guessing decisions or feeling stuck when it comes to other decisions in my life. We’re all at stages of our lives where we’ve either made big decisions or are in the process of making them. And we’re taking different roads to get to these decisions to ensure we’re doing the right thing. Making pro and con lists, risk vs. benefit charts, getting opinions from those you trust, doing research, etc. but those will only take you so far— if you can’t fight or look past your anxiety and fear, you won’t be able to make a decision you’re at peace with.
COVID and this post-pandemic world has only exacerbated our decision-making process by adding to new daily stressors to our lives. Whether it’s making a decision about our health, careers, or relationships, our brains become wired to operate on the safer side. I crave to find a balance between our child-like impulsive brains and adulting rational mindset when it comes to making decisions. Nothing productive ever comes out of overthinking or making decisions based out of fear—and if you’re struggling with this, you’re not alone cause I’m very much in this boat.
If only we each had a Magic 8 ball to guide us. But then again as I’ve learned through bouts of pain, tears, and chaos over the past few months—what is life if not for the journey?
That’s all for this week, thanks for being here and if you haven’t already, follow The Modern Millennial podcast on Instagram to stay updated when the new season launches. Now, I’m running off to finish binge-watching Never Have I Ever.
xo,
Arpita
PS - Please excuse any small typos, this is a one-woman show